Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Diary of a Biker Girl!

I am pretty sure most or some of you my adorable readers will want to read a story about a biker girl who looks like this:

 


Well, sorry to burst your bubble because the story you are about to read, is the story of a biker girl who actually, looks like this:

 
Biker Girl noni!

Sasha is a teacher, child lover and bad ass driver who dares to drive cars that no one else looks forward to driving. She is a classical example of a voluptuous lady who has flesh in the right places, but people call her a plus size beauty. That's by the way... Sasha had this SUV she loved so much until it packed up. Seeing that Nigeria is facing recession, Sasha decided to park her SUV at her parent's house. Being immobile was what turned Sasha into a biker girl. 'Ah riding Okada can be so much fun' Sasha thought to herself, UNTIL she started experiencing certain things that led her into creating her 'Diary of a Biker Girl'. Find excerpts from Sasha's diary below...

DAY 1: Bad Hair Day

Getting dressed was so much fun today. Yesterday though, I went to Mama Bulus to get my hair made and it is sooooo on point. Fast forward to the time when I walked to the junction to get a bike. 'Resettlement', I said. '150' he answered. 'Smooth', I said to myself. 'Please tilt your bike so that I can get on it', and he did. Our conversation was in Hausa by the way. Zoom, and off we went. 2 seconds into the ride to work, I noticed something was going on....

The Hair
 
'I didn't pick my hair brush', I started feeling nervous cos today I'll be teaching teenagers for the first time and I can clearly remember what I did to my teachers who looked scruffy in class. 'I am in soup', I said to myself. On arrival, I began using my finger to stroke my hair when a student was kind enough to offer some help. Feeeeyuuuu! I will not forget my hairbrush tomorrow. #DiaryofaBikerGirl
 
 
 
DAY 2: Stares and Funny Comments
 
Yes, today was extremely hilarious. As I write this, I can't help but laugh out loud. I got to the junction to catch a bike ride as usual. I noticed all the bikes were taken and I was running kinda late. I was about stopping a cab when I saw this bike man coming towards me in all his glory! Had to put his arrival on 'Slow mo' in my head cos he was a sight for sore eyes at the time. However, he was soooooooo skinny! I was like what the hell, let's go there. On our way though, I noticed a lot of people were staring and I wondered why....
 
 

The Contrast

Disclaimer: This isn't me, I am NOT this big, BUT this is exactly how I looked on the bike with this skinny 'Mai mashin'. At the traffic stop, someone summoned courage to say 'Kai, Oga, Ka yi Kokari', 'Kai Oga you try', and we all burst out laughing. I will know to pick on someone 'My own size' tomorrow. #DiaryofaBikerGirl



 

DAY 3: The Race

So, I kinda had a good day today. I was on a bike heading to work as usual, and then I saw some of my students... 'Aunty good morning', they yelled as they waved and smiled at me with all their strength...


Even the bike man was excited... One of them said 'We'll race you to school'. I looked at them, gave them a batman stare and said 'Game On'. "Mallam mu yi rige rige". "Oga, let's race them". Bad idea... The Bike man was into it, they were winning at some point, I was winning at some point, it was a tie at some point until...
 
For Races and Flat Tyres
 

 'POW'! We got flats! The kids waved and rode away without a care in the world. Good thing we didn't flip over. Lesson learnt! #DiaryofaBikerGirl

DAY 4: Of Tight Dresses and Comfort

Today, I had the most comfortable bike ride to work. The 'Mai Mashin' didn't have to tilt his bike for me to get on cos there was no handbag to weigh me down. Sometime ago, I wore this Straight cut Ankara gown and totally forgot that I was going to go on  a bike ride... This was the struggle...

The Struggle to climb was epic

 
Thighs out, holding on tight to the mai mashin, and hoping 'peek-a-boo' does not take place when I get off the bike eventually. I decided from that day, to always dress the part and look sharp for the 'biker girl' experience. #DiaryofaBikerGirl.
 
 
Sasha is still a biker girl to this day, and she still records her experiences, hoping not to fall off an okada anytime soon. She hopes to be a pro biker girl in future and hopefully own a bike of her own someday soon. Watch this space for when it happens. XoXo.